Happy Friday! I’ve been MIA from a lot lately. I visited home last week from Friday to Wednesday, and now am getting back in the swing of things. Being home made me feel refreshed. It’s like a big ball of comfort that’s soft, and cozy and indulgent. I am not saying being in Massachusetts isn’t. Here I am the person everyone has known for a month, and not who everyone back home has known for years. I guess what I am saying is, I am still carving my place out here and still feeling like my comfort ball is more like a rubber band ball, ready to snap at anytime.
Everything about living, working and even eating every meal here sounds ideal, and it is. There is such a schedule; you get to know everyone really fast because you are with them all the time and there is no cooking! Although I came here with every intention of feeling independent and having myself grow, I sometimes wish I could lay on a couch in my own living room, blast my own music while cooking a delicious shrimp/feta/orzo casserole. I guess accompanying change are reservations.
When I start to have these reservations, I stop and try to let my thought process be. When I do this, my overall mood is happy and content. So far, I feel all my experiences here have been positive, different from where I lived last summer. I think at this time in my life, this is where I should be. But I would love the occasional television show and bag of chips like us all:-)
I find a lot of the people that surround me here I can relate to, and they are all trying to gain something from this experience, not simply to fill a couple months of time. Everyone has there own demons and their own strengths, and it’s a harmonious cohabitation of driven individuals.
At times I feel alone, overly-stimulated, ecstatic, happy, excited and at peace, and when I collide with these emotions they are heightened. It may be the absence of distraction, or the presence of myself.
Maybe it’s just the harvest moon this Sunday that’s to blame for my feelings of fullness…
"Because I'm still in love with you
I want to see you dance again
Because I'm still in love with you
On this harvest moon." -Neil Young
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