Monday, August 15, 2011

Heavy on My Heart

I'm sitting in the airport waiting for a flight I didn't plan to take.

Early this morning my phone rang.  I could see the incoming call was from a family member, who I knew could only have bad news at that hour.  I silently prayed for a minor accident... instead it was my worst fear.

My dad died.
I howled. I cried and I moaned.
I still don't know much.  It was probably a massive heart attack.  My mom couldn't even get him to the hospital, he died about two minutes after she got him in the car.

My brother called shortly after, and we only talked for a few minutes - he had mom to take care of -  so I was left to sob and wail all on my own at 1:30 in the morning.  The first thing I did was open the laptop to book a flight home.
I called my best friend, waking her from a sound sleep - but it was the best thing I could have done.  She sat with me, states away but with me.

All I could say is that I was not ready for this.  I am not ready to live without my daddy.
I told her that my mom, my brother, his wife and kids were all able to be there and see him one last time. Being the only one far away is lonely.  It's even lonelier in a one-bedroom condo with no one there to wipe my tears, or hold my shaking body.

I couldn't in good conscious keep her on the phone... so I said goodbye and started throwing suitable clothes into a suitcase.
After another quick conversation with my brother, I went back to the computer hoping for an available flight earlier than 9:00PM.  I decided to look at flights to the next closest city and booked the 7:00AM flight.

I threw more clothes and shoes into my suitcase, realizing that I had to head to the airport in less than two hours.

I called a night owl friend to see if he could take me to the airport, but of course he was sound asleep.  I dropped off a spare set of car keys at my office so that he could bring my car home later... as I don't know how long I'll be out of town and I didn't want to park in off-site, long term parking.

The moment I got on the interstate, at about 4:20AM I saw that all three lanes were narrowed to one... and there was a long line of red tail lights before me.  I thought to myself, "Seriously?" and then prayed, half joking, "Part the waters Lord.  At least keep the traffic moving so I don't miss my flight."

The traffic was moving, but I started to wonder why there were traffic cones and no construction workers.   The next thing I saw was a police car in the next lane, driving backwards... then ahead of him, a construction truck with a worker picking up traffic cones!

I laughed out loud and said, "You are a gracious and wonderful God! Part the waters indeed!"

I'm waiting for the plane now.  My aunt and uncle are driving to pick me up from the airport.
I don't know what happens from here.

It is well with my soul... but heavy on my heart.
Thanks Bloggy friends.  Typing this to share with you has been a lovely distraction.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrjnYTW-fsQ

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