What I Don't Want to Be

I have seen a potential future... and it has scared me.

or scarred me. Yikes.

I admit that I don't get out enough. Another under-employed friend of mine suffers the same problem. It's hard to go out because you know you'll buy a drink, or even just a soda, maybe an appetizer - all at an inflated price - so it's easier to just stay home and not spend money.

The other night we decided to get out met real live people. A certain establishment in Denver sponsors a free concert each week during the summer so we went there.
This establishment is also known for being the number one Cougar hang-out in the city. Let me tell you, this place was Cougar-ville. And Cougar-ville doesn't look anything like Courtney Cox!
My friend and I arrived at the patio - concert atmosphere and she noted that for once in the past year, she felt really young!

I looked around and all I saw was OLD.
I hate saying that because old does not equal BAD. Allow me to explain by sharing my thought process.

I looked around and saw all these older men. Some of them looked pretty good. Most of them did not. I wish it were not true but I am just not attracted to older men.

Though I will admit that in my 20s I found actor Craig T. Nelson extremely attractive - but let's face it... back then he was about the age I am now!
But more concerning to me, were the cougars themselves. Decked out in outfits meant for someone 20 years younger - obvious make-up plastered on their tight-post-plastic surgery faces... and still prowling for a man.

My mind flashed to myself in 7 to 10 more years. I pitied these women.
The same as I pity the paunchy 60-year-old divorced men out there still prowling for a mate.

I don't want to become that.

Sure - their single status may be the result of a divorce, or even an untimely death - but I find it so sad when these old coots are still out pursuing women... especially if they are cruising woman 20 years their junior.

Oh my, I sound so judgmental!!! And I don't want to be!

But most of all, I don't want to be a lonely old woman still searching for love after my crow's feet are deeper and my butt is even flatter.

Honestly, I can't afford the plastic surgery it would require to enhance my boobs and tweak my face... and I wouldn't want to invest in that anyway.

I'm 40 and I need to find my love now!

(what great relief to hear from McTwitchy the next day ... who is out of town and messaged that he misses me! Whew.)